A gentle, practical guide to preserving the messages that matter most.
Grief arrives in unexpected moments. You might be making a cup of tea, or lying awake at three in the morning, and suddenly you reach for your phone, not to call anyone, but just to read their messages again.
If you have lost someone close to you, the chances are that a significant part of your relationship with them lives inside your phone. The Sunday morning check-ins. The voice notes. The messages that ended with three kisses. For many people, a WhatsApp or iMessage conversation thread is the most complete record of a relationship that exists anywhere.
The problem is that those messages are fragile. Phones get lost, broken, or upgraded. Platforms change their policies. Numbers get reassigned. WhatsApp users on Mumsnet have reported the heartbreak of one day seeing the message "your loved one has left the group" - a notification triggered automatically when a phone number falls inactive. These things happen without warning, and when they do, there is no getting those messages back.
This guide walks you through how to save your WhatsApp and iMessage conversations safely, step by step, so that whatever happens to your phone or theirs, those words are protected.
Before You Do Anything Else
If your loved one's phone is still accessible and active, the single most important thing you can do right now is back it up. Do not wait. Every day that passes is a day closer to the account becoming inactive, the number being reassigned, or the device becoming inaccessible.
If you are working from your own phone - saving conversations you had with someone who has passed - the same urgency applies. Phones break. Upgrades erase. Screenshots get deleted. A proper backup takes less than ten minutes and means you never have to worry again.
How to Export a WhatsApp Conversation - iPhone
WhatsApp has a built-in export function that works on both iPhone and Android. It is not perfect - it saves messages as a plain text file rather than preserving the visual format — but it is the fastest way to get a copy of a conversation onto your computer or into cloud storage.
On iPhone, open WhatsApp and find the conversation you want to save. Tap the contact or group name at the top of the screen, then scroll down and tap Export Chat. You will be asked whether to include media - if you want to preserve photos and voice notes, select With Media, though be aware this creates a larger file. From there, choose where to save it. Emailing it to yourself, saving to iCloud Drive, or sending to your Notes app are all reliable options.
One thing worth knowing: WhatsApp's built-in export can only go back as far as a certain point, depending on your device and settings. If the conversation spans many years, you may find that only more recent messages are included.
How to Export a WhatsApp Conversation - Android
On Android the process is similar. Open the conversation, tap the three dots in the top right corner, select More, and then Export Chat. Choose whether to include media and select your preferred destination - Google Drive, Gmail, or another app. The exported file arrives as a zip containing a text file and any media attachments.
How to Save iMessages - The Simple Method
iMessages - the blue bubble conversations that live in Apple's Messages app - are a little different. Unlike WhatsApp, there is no built-in export function within the app itself. The most straightforward options are:
The first is iCloud sync. If you have Messages in iCloud enabled on your iPhone (Settings, your name, iCloud, Messages), your conversations are automatically backed up and will persist across device upgrades. To check whether this is active, go to Settings, tap your name, tap iCloud, and look for Messages. If it is turned on, your conversations are already being saved to your iCloud account.
The second option is to back up your iPhone to your computer using Finder on a Mac or iTunes on Windows. This creates a complete local backup of your device including all iMessages.
Once You Have Saved Them - What Next?
A PDF on your computer or a text file in your iCloud is safe, but it is not the same as something you can hold. Many families who have gone through this find that having the conversations exist only digitally still feels precarious - one deleted file, one forgotten password, one lost hard drive away from being gone.
At Immortalised, we take the conversations you have saved and turn them into something permanent. A beautifully designed framed print for your wall or a book you can keep on your shelf that holds the exchanges that meant the most. Your conversation, faithfully recreated in a clean, timeless design - scaled to A3 or A4, printed on premium fine art paper, and delivered to your door.
The words are already there. We just help you keep them forever.
A Few Things Worth Doing Today
Even if you are not ready to do anything else right now, these three steps take less than fifteen minutes and mean you will never have to worry about losing those messages:
Back up your iPhone to your computer or iCloud today.
Export the most important WhatsApp conversations using the built-in export function and email the files to yourself.
If iMessages are the priority, check that Messages in iCloud is turned on in your Settings.
At Immortalised, we preserve your most treasured WhatsApp and iMessage conversations as beautifully designed framed prints, posters and books. If you would like to find out more, visit immortalised.life.